Umm.. Another cheater post.

I don't really consider this to be a post, because it didn't take much thought. But it is thoughty enough to make it to the front page, so here it is, along with a special credit card for our "Ernie's Flying Pig Service" stockholders.

Rely to Kato:

Kato Said: “I recommend training some of the larger sows for passenger flights…”

As you might have already guessed, we considered passenger service, but the government regulation for transporting passengers became too prohibitive. For instance, the Feds require that passenger service be provided by sows only, because they are much more determined than the boars. When two or more boars get put together they have a tendency to squeal, squabble, and argue. They make very slow progress, and they are easily distracted from the tasks that they are assigned. They like to drink too much fermented swill and they get stinkin’ drunk and mean. They are strong flyers when they are competing against each other, but they sometimes forget where they are supposed to be going, because they are too busy competing against each other, so it wouldn’t be good to have them transporting passengers.

We like to hold the sows back, because the sows are where baby Pigs come from. We like to keep them busy making little freight haulers for us. If you work a sow too hard she becomes tired and unattractive, and her ability to attract a boar is diminished and our business depends on a healthy supply of flying freight piglets.

Then, the passenger compartments have to be much more luxurious than freight containers. Food and water becomes a problem. There has to be sleeping facilities, and a kitchen car, not to mention sewage containment.

There seems to be some kind of a plot to simply hinder everything nowadays, and you don’t have to look far to find that our government is not being very helpful. We applied for some of the bail-out funding, and we were required to submit a business plan explaining what we were doing. They liked our plan, with the flying pigs and all. They like the fact that we weren’t burning diesel. But, they say that California is the worlds fifth largest economy and we should apply to Arnold. Arnold refuses to believe that pigs can fly, and says that we have to prove it before he will fund us. My pig whisperer is working on the “flying problem“ as we like to call it, but so far the pigs have only been able to become airborn for short distances, like from where they are standing to the trough at slop time.

Passenger service is a fine idea, but it’s just not in the cards right now. Plus, I’ve done my part to solve the north coast’s freight problem, and I’m anxious to move on to bringing about world peace.