You know you belong on this blog…
1- If you’ve ever ended a sentence with three dots because it was just to confusing to continue…
2- If you’ve ever started a sentence with a conjunction. And, even worse, you don’t know what a conjunction is. But, you write real good anyway.
3- If you’ve ever used a preposition to end a sentence with. This is the place you belong at.
4- If you never split an infinitive. You don't belong here. To boldly split infinitives is a goal on this blog. So you might need to unquestioningly know what an infinitive is, to gloriously know the true joy it can be to mercilessly spilt them.
5-If you know a lot of damn good expletives, they are also important to have, they fit-in damn near everywhere and they make short, dumb, sentences longer, and a hell of a lot more interesting.
6- If you know what a “loaner” (not in dictionary) is, but don’t know how to use “pedantic” (in dictionary) in a sentence, this is your blog.
7- You belong on this blog if you don’t like to ridicule people, or have them ridicule you.
8- You belong here if some of the best conversations that you ever had was while sitting in the dirt comfortably leaning back against a tree, or sitting at a picnic table with people just like you all around.
9- If yu cun reed thes sentanse, yu rite gud enuf to sey sumpthin! This is how I rite with spillcheck off.
10-If you have a memory, or a question, or you want to talk about your dog or your car, this is the place.
11- Mostly I want to hear YOUR stories, I’ve heard all of mine. So, if you think of something, it really doesn’t have to have anything to do with what we are talking about, just dive in!
Language doesn’t count here, communication does. If you are afraid someone will think that you are not too smart because you have poor writing skills, I need to tell you that some of the most interesting stories that I’ve ever heard in my life were from people that didn’t even know how to write. Some of the smartest people that I ever knew were people skilled in things other than writing. I’m eternally grateful to those people for some of the things that I know that nobody else knows.
Besides, I judge people’s intelligence by how well I think they could build a refrigerator. Otherwise known as RQ. (Refigerator Quotient) So if you are not somewhere on this scale, your ability to correct my English really doesn’t score many points with me!.
RQ Rating:
70-You can wipe your forehead with a wet cloth.
80- You can build an air-conditioner.
90- You can build an ice cooled box.
100- You can build a refrigerator.
110- you can build a freezer.
120- You can build a walk-in cooler.
130- You can build a walk-in freezer and the drain works.
140- You can build a complete supermarket.
150- You can build a supermarket, and even know what the engineer designed wrong,
160- You can explain why you are too busy to fix a refrigerator while you are really playing on your blog.
So, tell your stories. I want to hear them. "The three R's" really can stand for Reading, Writing, and Arithmatic on this blog.