Love, hope, and charity, in a rip-off world.

Photo from Wikipedia. "Brother can you spare a dime"

How many times have you turned on the news and been confronted with a poor sad faced child from a third world country. Usually they have an actor presenting the child to you, with the story line that all you have to do is send pennies a day to keep this child fed, clothed, and educated. Then you read that all of the food that is being sent to the African countries, where children are starving, is setting on a dock somewhere rotting. You become somewhat jaded and hardened because you know that most of the poor sad faced children that you see on TV are most likely part of a scam, or if not, most of the money goes to “administration."

I like to feel that the money that I spend for aid and health care in the world is actually doing some good. Sometimes the sad little children’s faces that I see on the TV get to me, and my guilt becomes somewhat unbearable. When that happens, I donate a little extra to a club that I belong to, and the funding that I give is actually matched by Bill Gates. I know and trust that ALL the money that I give is actually going to the right place. That is a real salve for my guilt.

You walk into a grocery store and see a can on the counter, “Little Billy needs a liver transplant” or some other expensive malady. You feel horrible, knowing how little that you can really do. As sorry as you feel for little Billy, you know that your children need new shoes and you haven’t even been able to save a thing for their college education. Sometimes I might put some change in the can, knowing full well its not enough to do any good.

I have a friend who’s wife had kidney failure, they had no insurance, but a relative was willing to give a kidney. I don’t know how much the operation cost, but it was well beyond his family’s means. He did a fundraiser, where he raffled off the family car. I bought a few tickets, and my wife bought a few tickets. I discussed it with her, and we both agreed, that if we won it, we would give it back to them. You know that I didn’t win it, luck never works that way when you want it too. I saw him the other day and he told me that his wife would be getting the operation, and he would be “getting his wife back”, as he put it. It was a very warm feeling to know that I was a very small part of that. It was a bitter / sweet reward. Bitter knowing how little that I actually contributed, and sweet that his wife would be getting a new kidney. Then it’s not over yet either. She still has a long walk to the other side of the woods where she can be happy, healthy and whole again. They will be in my thoughts.

As I walk down the street, I am constantly panhandled. I guess I have that guilt stricken look on my face, like I might slide some beggar a buck or two. I admit that I have given some panhandlers money, but I have taken a very strict line of not giving to panhandlers. Some look like they honestly just need the money. Others look like whatever is wrong with then, they did it to themselves.

The rest of my day is distracted with wondering about whether or not the panhandler deserved the money, or if they just playing on my naivety. It somehow makes me angry, I’m not sure if it is anger at myself for not knowing what to do, or anger at the panhandler, for ruining my day. At any rate most people must feel like I do.

I’ve purposely watched people approach a panhandler situation, just to see how they handle it. Some people just open their wallet and hand them money with out even slowing down. Others look them over like they are trying to decide who the money would be more important to, themselves or the panhandler. Other deliver a sermon, give them money and move on. Still, others just give them a lecture and point out that they don’t belong here, they don’t give them any money and they look satisfied with themselves. A group, probably in the majority, remain stone faced and just walk on by.

Quite often people will change sides of the street, mostly I see women do this. I don’t understand it, but they probably don’t spend the rest of the day wondering what they should have done, because they successfully avoided the question. Why can’t men be more like that?

I wonder about the young people that I see in town that follow the concerts. They always look skinny and destitute, but they always seem to come up with the cash to get into whatever concert that they want to get into. Something can be said for their freedom, and lack of responsibility. I always think of Janis Joplin and the song “Me and Bobby Mcgee”, and the part where she says, “Freedom’s just a word for nothing left to lose”. From all outward appearances, it doesn’t look like they have much left to lose. I often think of a post that Kym Kemp did about “just walking by”, where she came across a poor broken-hearted waif begging on the street. She walked by, then started making up stories in her head about the poor girls perceived needs, to the point that she turned around, walked back to her, gave her some money and told her in no uncertain terms, “Call your Mom!”

This is one post where I will accept anonymous comments gladly. I was just wondering how you deal with all of the scams out there. How do you sort out what is right and what is wrong. What is the right thing to do in today’s world, when a lot of people can’t find jobs, and maybe, just maybe, the person on the street is too proud to admit that he can’t find work, and he says that he lives on the street because he likes it.