SPAM!!!

Okay… It’s not funny any more!

I used to think that it was hilarious when my wife, who is pretty much a prude, used to get spammed with solicitations to buy pornography and various “enhancement opportunities”. I would, with great glee, tell her to stay away from the porn sites and she wouldn’t be bothered with all that “smut stuff. I found that it was even more hilarious that her ninety-three your old wheelchair bound mother would get some of the same kind of spam. I secretly thought that I must have been pretty clever to have stayed away from the kind of sites that you might pick-up that kind of electronic venereal disease.

I always thought that I was a pretty broad minded guy, and probably wouldn’t be that bothered with porn showing up on my computer. I thought that I could just say; “Hey, It just showed up, it’s not my fault”, kinda’ like when the biker “Ladies” flash the crowd. It’s a real cheap thrill, and as long as I didn’t in anyway solicit it, I could enjoy it in complete lamb like innocence.

For years I had never received an unwanted e-mail. So, now lightning has stuck me. I now get about thirty to forty spam messages a day. To make matters even worse, I have my e-mail set up so I have to down-load it at home, and at work, before it takes it off the server. So, I get to go through all the spam in both places. At home I have installed a spam filter that removes much of the spam. Unfortunately, it also removed a few messages from people that I wanted to hear from. Now I have to, not only check the incoming box, I also have to check the spam box. That is a loss of ground.

Someone told me that if you ever use your credit card on the internet that the company that you do business with on the net sells your e-dress to the spammers. If I knew that was true, I would submit their company name to the spammers to get even.

I have gotten offers of every kind of fake watch and jewelry that you can imagine. The sad thing is, I might be interested in the REAL stuff. But, I guess that wouldn’t occur to the kind of slime-ball that would send out spam.

I remember in high school that I was in love many times with girls that would not look my way, and the girls that would chase me… for some reason I thought that they weren’t classy enough for me. Ahh… the pain of unrequited love!

Now, I’m being offered love on the internet that I assume is as phony as that Rolex Oyster that they are trying to sell me for ten dollars. And, besides, how would I be able to zip-up my pants if all those adds are true?

So, I guess my question is; how do I get rid of the spam and still keep my e-dress. And how can I get even with the worthless bastards that have spammed me?

I’ve always said “That a grudge worth having is worth holding”.